What To Do In An Elevator
WARNING: DON'T READ THE FOLLOWING IF YOU ARE IN A BAD MOOD. IT WILL RUIN EVERYTHING.
28 Things To Do While You Are In The Elevator:
1) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3) Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
5) Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After awhile, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
6) Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
8) Move your desk in to the elevator and whenever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
9) Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they'd like to play.
10) Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exit with the passengers.
12) Ask, "Did you feel that?"
13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14) When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
15) Swat at flies that don't exist.
16) Tell people that you can see their aura.
17) Call out, "Group hug!" then enforce it.
18) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering "Be quiet, all of you, just be quiet!"
19) Crack open your briefcase or handbag, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
20) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
22) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
23) Put your hand next to your ear and have an animated conversation as if you are holding a cellphone. Then remove your hand from your ear making sure that everyone sees that it is empty.
24) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25) Grinning, stare at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
26) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
27) Ask the person standing next to you if he has seen your crocodile as you have lost one and are quite despondent. Relate that your crocodile's name is Howard.
28) If there are religious people in the elevator with you then take out a tefillin bag and ask an obviously religious man if he has put on tefillin yet today [ala Lubavitch]. Then make the same offer to a religious woman.
That was comic relief. But for real, what can a a Yid [or Yiddene] do in an elevator?
1) Think about the existence of Hashem.
2) Say a Perek of Tehillim.
3) Review something you recently learned.
4) Feel love for another Jew.
5) Make a Cheshbon Hanefesh - where am I going? How are my middos? My Tefillah? What happened to everything I thought about during last Yom Kippur?
6) Think of a couple you can set up.
7) Remember that Hashem took us out of Egypt. And remember why [to SERVE]!
8) Remember what happened to Miriam when she spoke lashon hara.
9) Feel gratitude to Hashem that you have two legs, working kidneys, lungs, eyes, hearing etc.
10) Feel gratitude to your parents for everything they have done for you and think of ways to repay them [if possible].
11) Think of who needs cheering up. Then when you get out of the elevator call them up and cher them up!!
12) Add to this list.
Sweetest friends!! Mitzvos are available EVERYWHERE. We just have to "chap arein".
Love and blessings!!!!!!!!
28 Things To Do While You Are In The Elevator:
1) When there's only one other person in the elevator, tap them on the shoulder and then pretend it wasn't you.
2) Push the buttons and pretend they give you a shock. Smile, and go back for more.
3) Ask if you can push the buttons for other people, but push the wrong ones.
4) Call the Psychic Hotline from your cell phone and ask if they know what floor you're on.
5) Hold the doors open and say you're waiting for your friend. After awhile, let the doors close and say, "Hi Greg. How's your day been?"
6) Drop a pen and wait until someone reaches to help pick it up, then scream, "That's mine!"
7) Bring a camera and take pictures of everyone in the elevator.
8) Move your desk in to the elevator and whenever someone gets on, ask if they have an appointment.
9) Lay down a Twister mat and ask people if they'd like to play.
10) Leave a box in the corner, and when someone gets on ask them if they hear something ticking.
11) Pretend you are a flight attendant and review emergency procedures and exit with the passengers.
12) Ask, "Did you feel that?"
13) Stand really close to someone, sniffing them occasionally.
14) When the doors close, announce to the others, "It's okay. Don't panic, they open up again."
15) Swat at flies that don't exist.
16) Tell people that you can see their aura.
17) Call out, "Group hug!" then enforce it.
18) Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering "Be quiet, all of you, just be quiet!"
19) Crack open your briefcase or handbag, and while peering inside, ask, "Got enough air in there?"
20) Stand silently and motionless in the corner, facing the wall, without getting off.
21) Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce in horror, "You're one of THEM!" and back away slowly.
22) Wear a puppet on your hand and use it to talk to the other passengers.
23) Put your hand next to your ear and have an animated conversation as if you are holding a cellphone. Then remove your hand from your ear making sure that everyone sees that it is empty.
24) Make explosion noises when anyone presses a button.
25) Grinning, stare at another passenger for a while, and then announce, "I have new socks on."
26) Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers, "This is my personal space."
27) Ask the person standing next to you if he has seen your crocodile as you have lost one and are quite despondent. Relate that your crocodile's name is Howard.
28) If there are religious people in the elevator with you then take out a tefillin bag and ask an obviously religious man if he has put on tefillin yet today [ala Lubavitch]. Then make the same offer to a religious woman.
That was comic relief. But for real, what can a a Yid [or Yiddene] do in an elevator?
1) Think about the existence of Hashem.
2) Say a Perek of Tehillim.
3) Review something you recently learned.
4) Feel love for another Jew.
5) Make a Cheshbon Hanefesh - where am I going? How are my middos? My Tefillah? What happened to everything I thought about during last Yom Kippur?
6) Think of a couple you can set up.
7) Remember that Hashem took us out of Egypt. And remember why [to SERVE]!
8) Remember what happened to Miriam when she spoke lashon hara.
9) Feel gratitude to Hashem that you have two legs, working kidneys, lungs, eyes, hearing etc.
10) Feel gratitude to your parents for everything they have done for you and think of ways to repay them [if possible].
11) Think of who needs cheering up. Then when you get out of the elevator call them up and cher them up!!
12) Add to this list.
Sweetest friends!! Mitzvos are available EVERYWHERE. We just have to "chap arein".
Love and blessings!!!!!!!!
There aren't that many elavators in the old city but there are a lot of steps.
Posted by
hillthepill |
8:40 PM
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