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Elul Recall Notice

This has been circulating and was sent to me by my sweet friends Avraham Yitzchak ben Esther and Beryl Halevi ben Elisheva.

Regardless of make or year, all units known as "human beings" are
being recalled by the Manufacturer. This is due to a malfunction in
the original prototype units code named "Adam" and "Eve" resulting in
the reproduction of the same defect in all subsequent units. This
defect is technically termed, "Serious Internal Non-morality," but
more commonly known as "SIN. Some of the symptoms of the SIN defect:

[a] Loss of direction
[b] Lack of peace and joy
[c] Depression
[d] Foul vocal emissions
[e] Selfishness
[f] Ingratitude
[g] Fearfulness
[h] Rebellion
[i] Jealousy

The Manufacturer is providing factory authorized repair service free
of charge to correct the SIN defect.
The Repair Technician, Hashem, has most generously offered to bear
the entire burden of the staggering cost of these repairs. To repeat,
there is no fee required.
The number to call in for repair in all areas is: PRAYER.

Once connected, please upload the burden of SIN through the
REPENTANCE procedure. Next, download ATONEMENT from the Repair
Technician, Hashem, into the heart compon ent of the human unit.. No
matter how big or small the SIN defect is, Hashem will replace it

[a] Love
[b] Joy
[c] Peace
[d] Kindness
[e] Goodness
[f] Faithfulness
[g] Gentleness
[h] Patience
[I] Self-control

Please see the operating manual, TORAH, for further details on the
use of these fixes. As an added upgrade, the Manufacturer has made
available to all repaired units a facility enabling direct monitoring
and assistance from the resident Maintenance Technician, Hashem.
Repaired units need only make Him welcome and He will take up
residence on the premises.

WARNING: Continuing to operate a human being unit without corrections
voids the Manufacturer's warranty, exposes the unit to dangers and
problems too numerous to list, and will ultimately result in the
human unit being incinerated.
Thank you for your immediate attention.

Please assist by notifying others of this important recall notice.

Have an uplifting Chodesh Elul!

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About me

  • I'm Rabbi Ally Ehrman
  • From Old City Jerusalem, Israel
  • I am a Rebbe in Yeshivat Netiv Aryeh.
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