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Nice - But Too Late

Something that has irked me for a loooong time.

After someone passes on everybody gathers and talks about what a WONDERFUL person he or she was!!

Hey!! Why wait till he drops? Tell him while he is is still alive. Let him enjoy the sweet feeling of being appreciated. Everyone needs some measure of admiration and approbation. It is like oxygen for the spirit.

Another point. If you tell a person that he is, for example, generous, then he will begin to act more generously. A compliment is a way to change someone's self-perception which in turn will change his behavior. [I have this weird, inexplicable urge to spell behavior like a Brit. So here goes. Behaviour. Thanks for indulging me. I have really nice trousers. But I no longer wear trainers. I really enjoy drinking tea in Boston. It reminds me to be a proud American free to spell behavio[u]r as I wish.]

It emerges then that by withholding complimentary words until after someone is gone, we are in fact stunting his emotional and spiritual growth.

One more thing. It's free!! But it is worth a great deal more than many things which cost us a great deal of money. So please compliment effusively. It will make the world a happier and morally greater place.

With Love and Blessings

Elchanan ben Henna Miriam

P.S. Great shalom bayis tip. Try complimenting your spouse hourly [at least]. Call from work to do so. See magic!!

I think that some people may only say the dead was a good person or this or that, when it may not be true.

I think when you look back on someones life, that is when you see the good, but not everytime.

Dear Perez,

If one looks hard enough he can find nice things to say about anyone

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About me

  • I'm Rabbi Ally Ehrman
  • From Old City Jerusalem, Israel
  • I am a Rebbe in Yeshivat Netiv Aryeh.
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